An Adventure In The Crazy Life

Friday evening about 7 pm I decided to run to a small town about 20 minutes away. I went to the old style Wal-mart, then on to the grocer.

The grocer is your average generic grocery store,a Safeway type store with small town appeal and an even smaller deli.

My house was low on food and I did not want to waste my opening weekend of deer season scrounging food for the family to eat. Thus my trip to the stores. (I also plan on hunting Monday morning while Wee One is in preschool.)

As I approached the only 2 cashiers working, a tall, extremely long-legged, denim clad cowboy was approaching the checkouts as well. He was dark headed, and very appealing.

I pushed my cart in line behind another full cart, then promptly cussed myself for picking the slowest moving cashier in the county. Much to my suprise, cowboy fell in line behind me. I noticed he had 1 clove of fresh garlic and a gallon of whole milk. When he saw me looking at him, he smiled and said, “hello.”

Since I had a huge cart load, I offered to let him go in front of me in the check out. He declined, saying he noticed I had quite a bit of meat and frozen items in my basket and I shouldnt let it set out any longer than possible.

Cowboy and I made small talk about each other’s neighbors and opening day of rifle season. We chatted up about our rifles and the trials of hunting the big bucks in the thick Oklahoma brush.

I noticed Cowboy was not wearing a wedding ring. I also noticed he could have easily been 5-10 years younger than my 38 years. It was hard to judge his age under his black cowboy hat and by his soft brown eyes.

Slower than molasses in January checker finally finished bagging my groceries, I paid and left the store.

I am usually inclined to park out in the ‘back forty’ of parking lots. I do not like people parking close to me, winging open their junker car doors, and dinging or scratching my beloved car. Besides, my fat *ss could use a bit of exercise walking a few extra steps.

If I were in a bigger town, after dark, I would have parked in a well lit area up close to the store. Not on this night, for some reason my common sense had escaped me, leaving me wide open as easy prey for some freak serial killer.

When I exited the grocer at 8:45 pm, I noticed the empty, poorly lit parking lot and my pristine, white car parked in the near dark. There were 3 vehicles in the lot, one of them being mine. The other 2 were a Ford F-150 and a Dodge Feed truck pulling a 16ft stock trailer. I immediately assumed the Dodge belonged to the well over 6ft  moustached cowboy with the handsome smile wearing Tony Lama boots.

I pushed my remote and popped the trunk. I began putting my grocery sacks into my trunk when movement caught my eye to my right. I looked and spotted a stray dog. It’s hackles were up and it started to bark at me. Then 2 more large pit bull strays materialized out of the dark. I calmly kept stashing my groceries into my trunk, thinking to myself “people who do not spay/neuter their pets and allow their half breeds to run wild need shot’.

I never turned my back on the dogs, neither did I face them straight on. I kept my body language relaxed and tended to my groceries as if they were not even there. It was not hard because I had already unlocked my car and my .38 was stashed under the drivers seat. My mind had visions of each one of those strays with a bullet between their eyes.

I have a concealed weapons permit so I can do things like that.

I was stowing my last 2 bags inside my car when Cowboy walked out of the store and jumped into his truck. Noticing I was being bullied by a small pack of large sized dogs, he whistled at them and then threw out some kind of food. In my mind, I pictured beef jerkey but for all I know it could have been 2 day old Sonic burger leftover.

The dogs were distracted by the food, I was distracted by his help and then my stoooooopid cell phone ringing. I had to check my phone because I was expecting 3 calls I needed to take.

Yes, 3 damn calls! 1. best friend L about an upcoming outing 2. Bubba who was needing a ride home form the ball game 3. a sister-in-law about Thanksgiving plans.

Seeing it was ET calling, I ignored it and climbed into my car, then rolled my window down to thank cowboy for his help.

I hollered out my open window, “thank you!”

and he smiled, then responded with, “you have got the longest eyelashes I have ever laid eyes on, they are beautiful.”

Then he drove off. I faintly heard Aerosmith’s ballad ‘Angel‘ coming from his open window.

I held my breath wishing he was turning right but I knew he wasnt. Cowboy told me where he lived when we were talking about hunting.

I turned my car right, onto the highway and headed home to my family.


As I drove home with my mind on the many things in my life that have been distracting me these past few weeks, it occurred to me to call the grocer and report the ‘attack dogs’.

Things have been uneasy around the Res and not necessarily in a good way:

A. Best friend D’s mother passed away. D isnt doing so hot.

B.The hubs and I have locked horns over something that angers me beyond words and too complicated to explain right now, right here-it will require an entire post all by itself.

C. Bubba had an awesome trip to OSSM (Oklahoma School Of Science And Math) on Thursday in OKC. We are in the process of getting his applications filled. Bubba has a pre-ACT he is now studying for. He also will need to take a pre-SAT at the same time. Bubba will need to do this next year in the 9th grade (actually, over the summer).

D. Last night, Wee One was up half the night with his Left ear hurting and fever. His ENT appointment was SUPPOSED to have happened on last Wednesday but has been rescheduled to the 5th of Dec. His next pediatrician appointment is on Tuesday.

I could go on but it is tedious………more of the story:

As I see my driveway in the distance, I dial 411 information. I called the store knowing they still had 25 minutes left before they locked their doors.

The female manager I spoke to thanked me and informed me, these ‘attack dogs’ have been a prior problem. She was very concerned.

I am concerned the next person the stray pack might bully/attack will be a child or an elderly person.


This morning was opening Day. I was out in my blind from 6:30 am until 10:30 am. The only thing I heard and seen was a couple of p*ssed of Squirrels who acted like I was out of line by being in their woods. Lucky for their annoying little butts I was carrying my 30.30 and not the .22 Marlin or I might have shot them for being so bothersome. Then brought them home to make a stew!

I left the woods a tad early because I promised Wee One I would take him to the matinee of Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium if he was feeling better.

Bubba called home at 11:30 am. He shot a buck. Photos to come later……



Filed under Ramblings

20 responses to “An Adventure In The Crazy Life

  1. Aniin BG.

    My, my. You sure do live an exciting life and interesting life. I’m glad the dogs didn’t hurt you, but they need to be taken care of. Cowboy “tall, extremely long-legged, denim clad dark headed, and very appealing” sounds like he was appreciating more than your eyelashes. Seeing as he was behind you in line.

    Hope you have better luck on Monday in the woods. I bet Marvin would take care of those squirrels right quick.

    Have fun with Wee One and a great weekend.

  2. I was beginning to think you were writing a novel. Not because of the length but because of the way it flowed. I could just picture that cowboy.

    The thing with the dogs sounded scary. I’m glad that you’re ok. Even with a gun, they could have done some damage.

    How did Wee One like the movie?

  3. Wee One at The Matinee! Now that is cool!! I’ll bet he is excited. I love animals, but have my reservations about the Pit Bull breed. A little flirtation at the grocery! 🙂 Be careful out there, Barngoddess. Parking lots at night have become more dangerous that when we were kids. Have a nice weekend!

  4. dickiebo

    Strikes me that u appeal 2 just about everyone, except……dawgs!

  5. Brian-lol, it was an interesting night to say the least ;). Marvin has been lazy the last few days, I think those squirrels would give him a run fo rhis $.

    risingrainbow-your right about those dogs. I hope some sort of lawman is taking care of them, at least before they hurt someone. Wee LOVED the movie, I did too.

    MM-I know 2 pit bulls that are actually nice dogs, it doesnt mean I trust them. The breed is a dangerous one, just like rotts and dobes ect…Your right about thoseparking lots, they are a dangerous place. Ill be more careful!

    dickiebo-lol, at least not pitts!

  6. Rebecca

    Cowboy sounded appealing…he’s got strong bones (the milk) and if he was buying garlic—-chances are he can cook too….and sounds like he had good taste–as he was talking to YOU!

    He sounded like a good catch….you could be hunting buddies! = )

    Just enjoy the flattery!!!!!!!

  7. Rebecca

    Oh yeah….give those dogs Mick Vick they can gobble him up!

  8. The cowboy, yummy! The hubby, slap upside head. The hunt, so sorry. The dogs, still should have shot them.

  9. The dogs sound scary…but the story has a good ending. Your description of the cowboy has me picturing Aiden Quinn or Brad Pitt from Legends of the Fall. (Sigh)

    I hope Wee One feels better soon.

    Good for you for calling the store about those dogs.

  10. jo

    I love this post ! I got trapped in my car on a hot summer day by a pit bull for a cpl hours. Didn’t have my keys to roll the windows down either. What a nightmare…damn dawg wanted food and I guess I looked tasty.

    So ok…there has to be more to cowboy…spill !!!!!

    Hope Wee’s ear is better soon…and congrats Bubba !

  11. Sounds like a fun weekend! Who knew grocery shopping could be so romantic! It’s always nice to see someone attractive, and get some attention :0) Glad you let them know about the dogs– there was a case of that in our city a few weeks ago– but it killed a few neighborhood dogs, they finally found it and it had to be put to sleep.

    Anyway, sorry your first day of deer season didn’t go as great as you’d hoped, but I look forward to seeing Bubba’s deer! *hugs*

  12. What a day !!! Loved the photo!

  13. sometimes just our body language and NO FEAR will keep the dogs at bay. But, I’m sure there is an exception.

    Cowboy flirt. Well, he made you happy by complimenting you and there is NOTHING wrong with that at all.

  14. How big was the buck?
    How was the movie?

  15. rebecca-hunting buddies? okay! works for me 😉 those dogs-grrr I would have easily given them to Vick that night.

    celeste-lucky for hubs he was hunting far, far away from me all weekend…

    jolynna-he was movie-star handsome too

    jo-omg, how scary for you. Nope nothing else to spill, dammit. Maybe Ill see him around again???

    christy-a photo to come, I promise

    SM-yes! it was a GOOD day for sure 🙂

    pamela-you are right. Body language is KEY. and your also right about my cowboy being harmless flirtation-now if I were single…..I can fantasize right?

    kel-small buck, very good movie!

  16. Kat

    Hmmmmmmm…very interesting post..I enjoyed the cowboy visual…the only men ogling me at the grocery have eyes looking in different directions and drool running down their chins…LOL

  17. Barbara

    Sounds like a great day at the market! Love them Cowboys! LOL. As for the dogs, glad they didnt hurt you.

  18. yeehaw – nothing like a charming cowboy to make your day!!!

  19. Katie

    awww I want a cowboty tooooooo! lol.. ok.. I might just want to borrow one… 😉 cause I sure do not need another headache!

    I say shoot the dogs! People piss me off with their irresponsibility!

    Congratulations to Bubba on the deer.. 🙂

  20. You know, I’ve been thinking about this cowboy. I could use a little ego lift like that myself. lol

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